Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Jobs, jobs, more jobs....


My friend Amy posted a few days ago on her blog about a time when she used to work at Taco Bell and an unfortunate band-aid-in-the-beans incident that she once had. Her post on Taco Bell got me thinking about the many, many, many jobs that I've had in my now 28 years on this planet. And when you consider that I've only been working "real" jobs since I was 16, I've only actually had about 12 years of working experience.
Here's the thing. Working is SO over-rated. I don't stick with things for very long - I'm slightly flaky, unless it's something I *really* like -
like my husband.
or kids.
or photography, or volleyball. And that's about it. I suppose I'm easily distracted, or bored, or afraid of commitment, or whatever.
Just before I wrote this blog, for example I was cleaning out the tadpole tank. Yes, we still have them, dangit - I HATE those stupid smelly tadpoles. Apparently, we chose 3 of the mutant deformed tadpoles that will NEVER EVER turn into actual frogs. Anyway, in the middle of cleaning their vomit-in-the-mouth-inducing tank I decided to take a break - and fold the laundry, play with the dog, check on the kids, and then go outside. Why was I going outside again? Oh yeah, to get a rock to put IN the tadpole tank to encourage the little freaks to turn to frogs so they could climb up on it and we could be rid of them. Tadpoles....tadpoles....Oh yeah! I WAS cleaning them out - like 45 minutes ago. They're probably tired of swimming around in the dixie cup so I head back to finish cleaning their tank so I can return them to a more roomy environment. See what I mean? I don't finish things often...

What were we talking about??

Oh yeah, jobs.

So....I got to thinking of all the many, many, many jobs I've had in my lifetime. So I thought I'd try to list them off. Some of these jobs I may have been at for 1 shift, some of them I may have had for a few years. All of them are real, many of them are accompanied by fabulous stories. Just ask if any stick out to you. I'll try to keep them chronological, but I'm sure I may mix some up and I'll definitely forget some. Mom and dad, you can probably help fill in the details for me if I miss something or get something out of order.

Summer of '95 - 16 years old - My first "real" jobs:
1. Burger King Employee - I SO wanted to be a burger maker, but I was delegated to cash register, blast it all. Apparently they thought I was just too darn cute in my Burger King visor to banish to the back near the hot and greasy grill - best to stick her up front where she can put on a cute face for the Burger King Corporation. And handle large quantities of money. Did I mention I didn't even know how to make change when I got this job??
2. Old person's home kitchen help - I did this job simulataneously with BK. I used to go from BK from 6 am until 2 then over to this "retirement center" from 3 until 7.

School Year, Summer 95-96:
Well, I had to pay for volleyball shoes and stuff, so working during the school year was a necessity. I needed something flexible, early in the a.m. or after school.
3. Bakery Assistant - yum. bagels. doughnuts. coffee. yum. And there was this unfortunate incident of floor mopping with an ammonia-bleach mixture. I almost passed out and I had a headache for hours.
4. Ice Cream Girl - Super popular ice cream stand in town - Doozies. It was THE hot spot for high school girls to work during the summer. I actually kept this job (summers only) for about 4 years. And I'm still waiting for my bonus.
Nevermind about that.
5. Kindergarten Tutor

'96-'97:
Still Ice Cream Girl, but also
6. Wooden Rocker, Resident Aide - which is basically a nice title to describe the person that feeds, showers, wipes butts, changes linens, chases after the escaped dementia patients (yes, it happened - several times), wards off the happy hands of dirty old men, wipes the tears of confused and sad old ladies, and plays along with Pearl, who was convinced that her cabbage patch doll was a real baby. Oh, and run like heck when Arlene thinks that you're hitting on her dead husband and chases after you with a cane. She was wicked fast - for an 84 year old.

Here's where things get interesting. I move away to college. Having the time of my life. FREEDOM!!! Mom and Dad say, "time to get a job". Dangit.
But I don't have a car - so I need to find something on campus.
My older brother Rob (i.e. the "golden child") went to the same college as me and HE worked with so and so at food service ALL FOUR YEARS he was there. What the --??? Who actually DOES that? Anyway, he had such a great experience, built up such a nice repor with the manager, blah, blah, blah --my parents are strongly encouraging me to start there. Ugh. So I do. And I get the job. Washing dishes.
7. Cornerstone University Food Service - dish washer. Gross. I held out for about a week, thinking that (1) they would see that I am quite OBVIOUSLY not the dish washing type and should definitely be promoted to a cook or manager, or (2) that I am a the little sister of the "golden child" and at least give me a little special treatment just for being in the same family, but they never saw the light so I quit after about 5 days. Did I mention it was gross??

Here's the thing about the dishwashing job. Gross though it was, at least I was hidden from my peers back in the bowels of the kitchen - I'm a freshman in college, and I'm cute, and I'm trying to make a good impression, you know? A girl's gotta look out for her rep. Seriously.
So next.....
8. Cornerstone University - housekeeping. Yeah. Bad move here. Now I'm doing gross stuff AND I'm within sight of anyone on campus. Once again....'bout a week here.
And so I find my job home for the next 2 years,
9. Cornerstone University - Switchboard operator. "Thank you for calling Cornerstone University, how many I direct your call?" Perfection. Talk on the phone, get the buzz on the first things going on at the school, flirt with the security guards, and do my homework so that I have time for socialization and other college....stuff.

--Somewhere about in here I meet Steve-o, in case you were wondering--

Back home for the summer and once again,
Wooden Rocker - resident aide. But also
10. McBride Homes - resident aide, 3rd shift. Similar to Wooden Rocker but instead of being a nursing home environment, it's a small house, with about 4 residents. And it was 3rd shift, so I basically just sat on my duff watching MTV all night and then made breakfast for the residents in the morning. And I kinda liked the whole 3rd shift thing. And occassionally things would get spiced up with a confused resident wandering the halls or night, or mistaking me for his mother, or wife (yikes!). Stuff Eddie's pipe and light it for him before bed. That's about it.

Back to school -sophomore year.
Still at Switchboard, but then I get a car and want to spread my wings.
11. Meijer - cashier. I applied, got the job, sat through a 6 HOUR TRAINING. The training was so boring, I didn't go back.
Switchboard is getting old, so I quit and move on to
12. YMCA Soccer Coach -
13. Youth Advisor.
For the life of me, I can't remember the name of this organization. But I spent spring break with them in Panama City. It was fun.

Back home for the summer, and once again it's
14. McBride Homes -
3rd shift. But this time I get placed in a home out in the middle of nowhere that apparently was used in the filming of House on Haunted Hill. It was without a doubt the most disturbing night of my life. I went home the next morning, told my mom I was never going back, burst into tears when she scoffed at me, and then refused to speak about it again. It was horrific.
15. Doozies - manager. Ahhhh....Ice cream. A nice reprieve from psychotic people.
16. Wooden Rocker.
Ahhh...my sweet old people who make me laugh. A nice reprieve from pscyhotic people with knives and haunted eyes...ahem. I digress.

Back to school - junior year.
17. Volleyball Coach - Northpointe.
18. Happy Elephant Child Care - child care worker. Yes, the name is ridiculous. But it was a lot of fun.
19. Intramural Director - Steve and I did this job together. He did most of the work.

Summertime:
Still Doozies, and elder aide.

School - senior year
19. Elder Care - 3rd shift. Can I just say that I DO NOT recommend doing a 3rd shift job and going to school full time?? It was really hard. I was going to work from 11pm until 7 am, I'd come home and shower then go to class from 10 until 3:00, sleep for a few hours and do homework, and then go back to work. It sucked. That was actually the one and only time I ever walked out on a job. It was about 2 am - I was bored out of my mind and the other 3 people that I worked with at this MASSIVE nursing home were really....er....weird, to say the least. So I took out the trash, and called Steve on my cell.
Me: (whispering) "I think I'm going to walk out"
Steve: "What? Why?"
Me: "I hate this job. The people I work with are weird. I'm tired. I'm bored. I'm taking out the trash and I'm going to get in my truck and drive home"
Honestly, I was feeling some major guilt because I was brought up to not ever do things like...well, walk out on a job. I needed some validation that it was ok.
Steve: "go for it"
20. Student Union Activites Desk Manager - thank you Jayne Crawford. 21. Internship - Liz's House Social Worker- Transitional Housing for Homeless Women and Children

Steve-o and I get married, and then
22. HeadStart - social worker.
Here's when I realize that I don't LIKE social worker, and get completely jaded by the career as a whole. Had some major issues with incompetent boss (who was fired 2 months after I left) so I moved on to:
23: Rainbow Child Development Center - infant wing supervisor. Not quite in my field, but enough so that I don't feel like a total loser.

Surprise! I'm knocked up!
Owen comes and I don't work for about 2 years. AJ comes in the meantime as well and my only job is MOM...and I begin developing the whole photography thing.

Living in Florida now and it's
24. Books A Million - customer service. Gratifying to know that I'm still a competent adult and am capable of more than diapers, drool, and dishes. Regain confidence lost during mommy-hood and begin to entertain the idea of photography as a business.

Move to Georgia.
Books a Million for about 6 months while we get settled in and then actually begin to call myself a photographer.
25. Tammi Nowack Photography is born.

Whew! See what I mean?? And I'm pretty sure that I'm missing one or two in there....they'll come to me tonight. I think there's a hotel in there somewhere (it last about 1 shift I think). So...who can beat me?? Let's hear about your job 'o the month.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

So thats pretty much the longest blog ever... =0) I CANT believe I stole your line!! ahhh! I knew I had seen something like it somewhere, but I couldnt remember where... oh well. Start from scratch yet again! lol
You've had some crappy jobs there Tammi. I'm thinking I like the Cornerstone housekeeping the best. I think that would last me like ten minutes. Its hard to believe you had that many odd jobs and that you can keep up with all of them...

Anonymous said...

WOWZAA!!!!
I've heard stories about several of you jobs, but this-this AMAZES me!
You should be congratulated and receive some sort of award.

I'm really glad that you've decided to be a photographer...You're GREAT @ it!

And you know my job-de-jour...I teach...but guess what: Friday is my last day!!! And just FYI...we will be celebrating!

Anonymous said...

Tam-

Okay, I guess tomorrow I'll begin telling all my jobs although, there will not be nearly as many.

Kat-
STOLEN! Are you talking about your business card draft, "Real life. Captured."? I thought I'd heard it somewhere before as well, now I know where, you little plagarizer...you.

Anonymous said...

You forgot the PAPER ROUTE--how could you forget the middle of the night paper route?!?

Anonymous said...

okay...so I started babysitting when I was 11...a five and three year old...all day. Who leaves an 11 year old with their 3 and 5 year old all day????

Worked for Dear old Dad at the family Lawn and Garden and Feed Store. My job specifically involved calling Amish people who have phones FYI, to see if they needed a delivery of feed (don't have pickup trucks FYI). The important fact to keep in mind, however, was that their phones were in the outhouse.

I got way too sophisticated to be selling Monkey Chow and alfalfa, so I got a job at the local steak house. They put me on as cashier because I could make change wicked fast but SUCKED at seating people BEFORE sending their order to the kitchen. I also had to wear a costume that my brother affectionately referred to as my "Gretel Gettup." Why would having a girl in a maroon wrap-around skirt and white puffed sleeve blouse make somebody want to eat more steak???

In college, I had the sweetest gig of all...I landed a job as office assistant to the most prestigious Prof on campus. He paid better than any other campus job and also did really nice things like buy me candy for my birthday. Vin is named after him.

I also worked for the second most prestigious prof on campus, who happened to be the chair of counseling, which was handy because that's when Robb and I broke up and I was a total head case.....

From there, I got a teaching job...though my degree is in High school English, I taught 4th grade. Which was a blast the first year, but not so much fun the second. I also get bored easily and have some kind of commitment problem.

From there, we moved to Massachusettes and I became the church secretary, which was very fun because I worked with hubby all day. When he was naughty, I let the telemarketers through. But then he knocked me up and I started staying home for a living...which is by far the most interesting job I've ever had.

Oh, yeah, and then i went to an auction and lost my head and bought a big box of antique silverware and had to sell it and the Ebay dream was born.....

Anonymous said...

DOH! *smack head*

How could I forget the paper route?? That job was actually really great - I made good money, in a small amount of time.
Too bad I couldn't maintain being awake for 4 hours in the middle of the night AND take care of two crazy boys the next day.

Anonymous said...

Out of the two of us, Daniel has the long list of jobs. I have worked 3. I worked at Sherwood Day Camp for 3 summers, I worked for 3 attorney's, and I am currently working for SCA teaching K3.But Praise God Almighty my last day is next week.

Yeah, I am not working material. 3 jobs in 21 years. sad.